If I knew how hard I'd be working as a pastor I'm not sure I would have responded to God's call. My parents owned a small business, so hard work was the norm in our family. I saw my parents do work at home, after being at work all day. I also saw them rest and take sabbath, sometimes at different times than other people we knew.
When I entered ministry, the thought of only taking only one day off a week, was something I had never thought of. Why is that an expected work schedule?
I enjoy hard work, but I need to rest. I need to do things other than ministry. I need to excercise. I need to be in the woods often. I need to sleep.
The reading is true, "the inescapable truism of leadership is that it is round-the-clock hard work."
The question is how do I balance. I have not balanced well, at the expense of my soul and my family.
Our church is planning for my sabbatical in the summer of 2012. No one can remember a pastor taking a sabbatical before. There are lots of questions floating around. It is just a long vacation?
The notion that the real weight of leadership is emotional, is one I've been thinking about lately. I'm good at resting physically, but resting emotionally is a different story. Caring for a community of faith is hard emotional work for me. Walking with someone in their last days before they die is hard work for me. I'm drained, and often will take the day off after the funeral.
My actions would tell you I don't trust the Owner of the flock very well. I need to trust, and remember I can not do it all.
My prayer is I would remember Psalm 127, and be less sleepless in the steeple.
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