Guard Yourselves or Let God Guard You?

[clein]

Day 26 – “Guard Yourselves� was a challenge for me. It still is. There’s something about it that makes me pause. I don’t think it’s because I’ve become a wolf and just don’t know it. I think instead that it’s because at times I’ve spent too much time self examining my motives and my subconscious failings and double guessing my “accommodating� the culture.

Now maybe some need to do a lot more self-examination. But I think there are others – me included – that have had to learn to do less. By upbringing I’m prone to self-criticism and introspection. I tend to doubt my motives and wonder about my real level of commitment. It can be paralyzing at times. I’ve second guessed myself for hours and I finally came to a conclusion.

The conclusion was that I WAS going to blow it. That I DID drift away from orthodoxy all the time. That I WAS accommodating in some way every day. That I WAS liable in my fatigue and to let the cynic run rampant.

I’m guilty of all those things and I’ve stopped wondering if it'll happen to me. I’m guilty and I just go right to repentance. I go right to the cross. I have to confess my weakness daily and beg the Father who guides our every step to correct me, to bring me back to His truth, to bend my thinking back to His.

I do think we should be on guard for ourselves but I stink at guarding. So I work hard to stay close to the guard who is my stronghold and my defense. I remember that I am as much a sheep as I am a shepherd and that I get to curl up at the feet of the Good Shepherd and let Him be the guard for us all.